Post Natal Depression



PND or Post natal depression, its a thing.. a common thing. I suffer it, many friends have experiences with it and I just want to share my story so I might help even just one woman feel OK.

Lets get one thing straight though, I love my daughter, she is my most precious thing, my being and I love her with everything that I am... But I didn't love her at first sight and in the wee hours of the mornings when she needed feeding every 45 mins I cried tears of frustration and utter despair. From the moment I met her I would have protected her with my life, I honestly would have but I didn't feel connected, I didn't feel love when I looked at her and I felt confused and frustrated at my lack of understanding toward this new bundle who needed me all day everyday.

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Image {Google}

I lasted 6 weeks before I saw my doctor in absolute desperation, I hadn't had more than 4 hours sleep a night for 6 weeks and I was on the brink. My doctor was amazing, she talked to me and listened, she gave me advice and sympathy and NO JUDGEMENT. I was amazed, she gave me the options of medication, counselling, support and most importantly she made me aware.

Aware that I was not alone, that this was common and it did not make me a bad mother or a failure.
Pop over here to view the stats on PND

I have a history of depression and I am very ok with that now, I know I have anxiety and depression and most likely it will never go away. Its part of who I am and what makes me tick, I suffered perinatal depression throughout my pregnancy and sought counselling but resisted medication because I wanted to try and avoid it if I could.

I am ok now, I have my great days when I feel I could take on the World as super Mum and other days when I despair at my life but mostly those days are few and far between.

I am lucky though, I have the most supportive and understanding husband and family and friends who have stuck by me and that network is my saving grace.

If your reading this and you need support reach out, to me, your friends, family your doctor. The most important thing is you seek support, its ok not to feel ok.

If you need advice or support or maybe your just curious, pop over here to the PANDA website. xxxx

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Image {Google, PANDA Website}